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Thread: Best lines you've heard.

  1. #16

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    Hi
    Hubby had a great one the other day. Was talking to him after being at the doctors and said I had lost 3 kilo's. Reply-- I will help you look for it when I get home tonight. Smart***s.

    Mrs H

  2. #17

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    HI . A couple of years ago ago my mate had his car stolen , so after that he got called mr carlos , just one of those stories you never let down !!
    5.5mtr Mclay Fisherman , 115HP optimax ,HDS5 lowrance ,


    Sometimes i wakeup grumpy and sometimes i let her sleep !!!!

  3. #18

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    I was down in at the pub with my grandfather and talking to a few of the old fellas that he knew and one guy says to me. I have known your grandfather that long, Jesus was halfback for the Jews when I met him. Lol still cracks me up now...

  4. #19

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    he would't shout even if a shark bit him

  5. #20

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    I remember when i was a young boy out in the garage and the old man was pottering about with his electrical equipment, I would often ask " Whats That ", His reply, Its a wigwam for a goose's bridal. cheers Ron.

  6. #21

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    When I did my apprenticeship many years ago, my old boss had a thousand ‘sayings” some are now common, some are as old as the hills.

    Never buy anything that eats.
    Never show fools and women anything half finished.

    When it comes to women, it’s better to rent than to own.
    Work… if it wasn’t for the money, we would stay at home.
    Vegetarian, an idiot who can’t hunt or fish.
    Always marry the youngest sister.
    Your birthday suit needs ironing.
    Battleship mouth, but a row boat brain.
    Last edited by Lucky_Phill; 28-07-2013 at 07:40 PM.

  7. #22
    Flasher than a rat with a gold tooth.
    Last edited by Lucky_Phill; 28-07-2013 at 07:41 PM. Reason: spelling to make sense

  8. #23
    Gold^^ fat fingers!!

  9. #24

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    I used to fish with a guy who would bait the gang hooks up with a pilly and cast out with the bait always flying perilously close to my head as we sat in the boat.. He always said "Don't worry ... I have never hit anyone!!" ............ until the day he nearly knocked me out with a half frozen pilly travelling at 300kph .... after that he would still cast the bait exactly the same but would say, "Don't worry I have never hit anyone .... well there was this one time!!" haha

    Good one Tony ... good times
    2008 Signature 520C with the Suzuki 90 4 stroke on the back

  10. #25

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    This boat doesn't run on thanks mate.

  11. #26
    Ausfish Platinum Member Funchy's Avatar
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    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    Quote Originally Posted by ronmac View Post
    I remember when i was a young boy out in the garage and the old man was pottering about with his electrical equipment, I would often ask " Whats That ", His reply, Its a wigwam for a goose's bridal. cheers Ron.
    Hahaha, that brings back memories of my Nanna. She used to say that. She was a good catholic woman who rarely swore but I remember as a small boy one time I asked what was for dinner and she said "pig shit and gooley gum" . Shocked the he'll out of a seven yr old lad but I use it to this day

  12. #27

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    Wife: I don't care what everyone says, you're wrong.

  13. #28
    My dad must of cleaned it up a bit... but I still like his way of saying it....
    we sometimes have a feed of 'Pigs Poop and GuliGum'

  14. #29

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    Yeah! Gold!!
    Quote Originally Posted by upstart View Post
    Gold^^ fat fingers!!
    "let not he boast who puts his armor on, as he who takes it off"

  15. #30

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    Old salt came up from Cardwell to buy a color Furuno Sounder off me years ago and described the calm sea at Cardwell, as being "Flat as a Shit Carters hat !!! Ha Ha!!

    Still laugh about that as I remember the dunny man coming to out place as a kid to take away the full pan.

    ' nother old mate said to me recently he was as busy as a dog eating wasps!
    Last edited by odes20; 09-02-2013 at 10:20 PM. Reason: spelling
    "let not he boast who puts his armor on, as he who takes it off"

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