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  1. #61

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    Okay nothing to do with fishing but I was at Leonards chicken shop today, they had some Chicken Kiev sausages, so knowing what's normally in Chicken Kiev I wondered if all the ingredients were in the sausages too, so I asked the lady what was in them, her thoughtful reply was "onion".
    PB List
    Largemouth Nannygai (Saddletail Seaperch): 92.5cm.
    Mangrove Jack (Reef Jack): 73.5cm (aiming for 90cm).
    Spanish Mackerel: about 5'6" (Aiming for 6' - I'll start measuring them).
    Red Emporer: about 4.5kg (tiny) length not measured.
    Fingermark: 62cm (thanks Bunny!).
    Cobia: 103cm.
    Barra: 111cm.
    Courses: Ryan Moody - Barra Basics; Wonky Holes; Thready Tactics. Recommended products Troll Pro; Action Disc; Lethal Lures; Garmin 95sv;

  2. #62

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    Went to Kentucky Fried one night for a quick feed and was told they "Sorry we are out off chicken but we have chips."
    Went to a fish and chip shop once " Sorry we are out of fish but we have chicken."
    Went to a fish and chip shop in Melbourne and asked what sort of fish was available? answer "Fiiiish mate you know fiiiiish mate" As he made a paddling motion with the hands. Obviously a specialist in the seafood industry

    All over it like a fat kid on a lollipop
    A few sheep short in the top paddock
    Just a young bloke having a go

  3. #63

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    flat out like a lizard on a rock

  4. #64

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    Serious as a heart attack

  5. #65

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    When expressing your hunger - could growl the bowel out of a leper through a cane chair

    When someone enquires as to what will the next meal consist of - Well I was going to make sh&t sandwiches , but there's no bread

    Also, useless as: A chocolate teacup
    An ashtray on a motorbike

    Ugly as: A smashed crab
    A bag full of arseholes

  6. #66

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    what we say about someone slow when it's their shout "so tight you couldn't drive a needle up his ar$e with a sledge hammer"
    about the village idiot at work "he may not be the sharpest tool in the shed but, he is a tool and he is in the shed"
    IFISHCQ2

  7. #67

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    In reference to someone with buck teeth....

    Could eat an apple through a paling fence.

  8. #68

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    Or an orange through a tennis racquet.

    Quote Originally Posted by Scott79 View Post
    In reference to someone with buck teeth....

    Could eat an apple through a paling fence.
    PB List
    Largemouth Nannygai (Saddletail Seaperch): 92.5cm.
    Mangrove Jack (Reef Jack): 73.5cm (aiming for 90cm).
    Spanish Mackerel: about 5'6" (Aiming for 6' - I'll start measuring them).
    Red Emporer: about 4.5kg (tiny) length not measured.
    Fingermark: 62cm (thanks Bunny!).
    Cobia: 103cm.
    Barra: 111cm.
    Courses: Ryan Moody - Barra Basics; Wonky Holes; Thready Tactics. Recommended products Troll Pro; Action Disc; Lethal Lures; Garmin 95sv;

  9. #69

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    She didn't bang once, totally dry, sat on 30 knots all the way home ... it was a good 6 to 8 foot (really it was, true), must have been blowing 25 knots that day we were the last to leave and still beat everybody back to the ramp ... these (please insert your boat here) can handle it.

  10. #70

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    When someone says that fish doesn't look very big what size is it? I just say "Edible size"

  11. #71

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    "as I said I am just a merchanic what is spell check just started using a computer "
    by Ausfish member, 28July 2013
    Pauly
    A Proud Member of
    "The Rebel Alliance"

  12. #72

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    Eating too much.........

    I'm as full as a doctors wallet
    I'm as full as a state school hat rack

    Work...

    I'm as busy as a one armed wallpaper hanger
    Busier than a one legged man in an arse kicking competition

    Time..

    We went fishing at stupid o'clock today

    one off's

    " What's the French word for Croissant " ?

    " NO.... your other right "

    " Were you born in a tent " ?

    Fishing........


    " You should have been here yesterday ! "

    " Not only is the water cold, it's deep ! "

    Famous last words:

    " I've never been sea sick "

    LP
    Kingfisher Painting Solutions:- Domestic and Commercial.

    For further information, contact details, quotes or advice - Click Here





  13. #73

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    True story many yrs ago.
    Mate eyes this hot chick and asks her "how do you like your eggs in the morning?"
    She replied "Unfertilized, F#$% off"

    Well about ten of us guys rolled around laughing our guts out at that comeback.
    Jack.

  14. #74

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    ur a blister ( u show up after the work is done)

  15. #75

    Re: Best lines you've heard.

    VMR Log on; Boatie.. 'We have 6 POB people on board today'.
    Cheers Shane

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