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jaybee
16-04-2002, 06:38 PM
Catch and Release - A conservation motion that happens most often right before the Fisheries and boating officer pulls over a boat that has caught over its limit.

Hook - (1) A curved piece of metal used to catch fish. (2) A clever advertisement to entice a fisherman to spend his live savings on a new rod and reel. (3) The punch administered by said fisherman's wife after he spends their life savings (see also, Right Hook, Left Hook).

Line - Something you give your co-workers when they ask on Monday how your fishing went the past weekend.
Lure - An object that is semi-enticing to fish, but will drive an angler into such a frenzy that he will charge his credit card to the limit before exiting the tackle shop.

Reel - A weighted object that causes a rod to sink quickly when dropped overboard.
Rod - An attractively painted length of fibreglass that keeps an angler from ever getting too close to a fish.

School - A grouping in which fish are taught to avoid your $29.99 lures and hold out for spam instead.

Tackle - What your last catch did to you as you reeled him in, but just before he wrestled free and jumped back overboard.

Tackle Box - A box shaped alarmingly like your comprehensive first aid kit. Only a tackle box contains many sharp objects, so that when you reach in the wrong box blindly to get a Band Aid, you soon find that you need more than one.

Test - (1) The amount of strength a fishing line affords an angler when fighting fish in a specific weight range. (2) A measure of your creativity in blaming that darn line for once again losing the fish.

Kerry
17-04-2002, 04:08 AM
Some boating terms

Dead reckoning: The state you reckon you will be in when your spouse finds all the boating-related charges on the credit card bill.

Boom: For sailboaters, the sound you hear when you get smacked in the head by that big stick hanging off the bottom of the sail. For powerboaters, the sound you may hear when you forget to change the oil too many times.

Heaving line: A rope you can hold on to while being seasick.

Rock: Device used to remove rudders from boats. Also what your boat does just after you fill all your glasses to the brim with port.

No Wake Zone: An area of a waterway in which you are prohibited from waking people who may be sleeping.

GPS: An electronic device that allows you to navigate out of sight of landmarks before the batteries expire.

Bow: What you do in front of your banker or spouse when you are asking for more money to spend on your boat. As your boat will surely cost much more than what you initially asked for, it is imperative that you learn how to do this quickly.

Astern: A type of look. Your spouse gives you astern look when you attempt to buy things for your new boat.

Wind scale for fisherman

Force 1, No wind, wish there was some.
Force 2, A little wind, not enough.
Force 3, Wind, aint it wonderful.
Force 4, wind, wind, wind, when will it ever end?
Force 5, wind, too much wind, can we go back now?
Force 6, way way too much wind.
Force 7, OH S***!
Recretional scale anything above 7 falls into the OH S***! catageory.

Cheers, Kerry.

Fisherman02
17-04-2002, 03:27 PM
two fantastic lists of terms
congrats fisho's
cheers jack