View Full Version : walking wounded storeys

16-12-2003, 01:43 PM
just read first aid kit and thought this would be a good topic to start.
i went fishing with my missus once.

she hit twice with sinker when casting & hooked once for good measure.

she has nevery gone fishing with me again


16-12-2003, 04:35 PM
Now that's a scam I can use. ;)


17-12-2003, 02:12 PM
how big a hook should i use? i want to make sure she never comes along again ;D

17-12-2003, 03:24 PM
lol.... my missus loves fishing. just gotta get her used to many hours of not catching anything when chasing jacks ;D

18-12-2003, 02:20 PM
as a young teenager I sharpened a filleting knife to a razor edge one night watching telly. Then proceeded to jump up in the ads & wave the thing around with both arms flying like GI Joe in mortal, martial combat with the enemy.

I suddenly noticed a large amount of blood flowing from my left index finger - I'd taken a fillet clean off the side that faces your thumb. Dad & mum got the local GP on the phone after hours who asked if they could find the fillet & ice it, it may be recoverable - we could not find it so went we to his surgery & got the finger stitched & bandaged.

The next night watching TV there she was; a bit dried & shrivelled by that stage, but stuck to the wall above the telly was the fillet off my index finger.



19-12-2003, 05:20 AM
a couple of months ago i was fishing for niggers on a breakwall with a carpark on it. Often people park and sit watching the water or fishermen.
Naturally when someone catches a fish there is generally people looking on with interest.
Sitting in 2 seperate cars behind me was 2 guys reading books or newspapers.
I hooked up stepped on a rock below me and my foot slipped about a 1cm. i wobbled backwards and forwards for a while and then decided water was softer than rocks so fell forward. i went in with the rod and all.
i climbed out of armpit level water with some scracthes on me and was surprised that the fish was still on so i reeled it in.
Catching my breath i looked up expecting these 2 guys to be in stitches from my antics. They had missed the whole thing to engrossed in the reading.
Sometimes funny things happen under your nose and you may not even notice. #:)

19-12-2003, 07:35 AM
OUCH to chris and sorry ba229 can't really say much as i'm almost wetting my pants laughing

i 'have on i didn't get hurt just my wallet

I was up in the highlands behind coffs harbour chassing trout we were walking along one of the wet damp high rivers i was taking it easy trying not to make too much noise or slip
well as you all know the harder you try not to do some thing the more likely you are to do it
YEP i went head over hills that was fine untill i got up and relised i just landed on my brand new coustom made samariu 004 rod
$350 bucks down!
shatterd into about ten parts! :-[ :'(
but was a good day till then got about 18 between us 9 odd were 4lb rest a bit smaller

19-12-2003, 08:41 AM
Took my brother in-law chasing a few bass once. It was a good day and we had both caught a few nice ones. We were standing on a bit of a rock shelf when he asked if he could have a go of my new rod, so I handed it to him. He went for the big sideways cast from behind me and planted both sets of trebles straight into the top of my head, snapping the 10lb trace in the process. Being an ex-army medic I let him have a go at trying to remove the trebles. After about10 minutes of twisting and pulling we decided that it wasnt going to come out without a bit of scalp surgery so we decided to drive about 20 minutes to the nearest doctors surgery. It was on new years day and when we got there we found a sign on the surgery door saying that he would be back in about 2 hours. Not wanting to give up on the bass, we decided to go back fishing. Managed to snag about another 7 good size bass before getting back to the docs. Felt like I had a hair clip or something pinching the top of my scalp up. When the doc cut the lure out he left a couple of chunks of my scalp attached to the trebles. A few weeks later I returned to have another go at the bass and used the same lure, scalp and all. It worked well caught another 2 bass on it before losing it to a snag!

19-12-2003, 10:09 AM
About 2 years ago I decided to try out my new homemade rod holder (a heavy old coffee table into which I’d inserted some "V" shaped poles to rest 2 rods on) at Cleveland Point one night. The idea being, I could just rest my rods on this thing and, when I got a bite, I could just lift up and I'd be on.......... the theory sounded good………

Anyway, it was awfully quiet - no bites for an hour or so - I decide to visit the other bloke fishing just up from me and got into a bit of a chat. Next thing I hear a big crash and look around.......... Oh sh%&t!!, forgot to set the drags......
there goes my coffee table and 2 rods toward the edge of the wall - off I sprinted and went for a big dive across the concrete to save my rods - missed and slid (across the tar and concrete) into the drink - I surfaced in time to see my brand-new rod and reel go sailing off into the darkness. So, I retrieved my table and my old rod and looked down to see blood dripping out of my stomach, hips, arms and legs. Having hooked some nice sharks off here, I decided it wasn't good to be in the water in the dark while pumping blood everywhere, so pulled my sad self out of the water.
There I was dripping wet, freezing cold, lost about $300 worth of rod and reel and lost a s%^&load of skin and blood. The other fisho comes over and says " geez mate, when you decide to have a swim, you don't muck about, do you..." and walked off chuckling to himself (obviously thought he was real clever).

Finally stopped shaking my head at my stupidity and muttering about bloody smartarses, got dry and changed into some new clothes and decided to fish on.
Half an hour later, the other bloke yells out to me - I run over and bugger me if he hadn't hooked my good rod and pulled it in for me - I coulda kissed him!!! (I just bought him a case of beer instead).

Couple of nights later - after heavily modifying my table/rod holder - I'm landing a fish on one rod when.... bang/crash, there goes the table again and off goes my other rod into the darkness- I wasn't up to another slide on the concrete or another swim - I'd set the drag too stiff - never saw that rod again. The fish on the other line - bloody catfish !!!

Well I've learnt from that and, as Jaybee can attest, after much modification (turned it upside down and added some weight at the bottom – and I now tie it to my car) I think I've got the rod holder sorted out now – haven’t lost a rod for a year or so.

20-12-2003, 08:01 AM
;D ;D ;D
Have you got any photos of yourself walking around with a lure stuck on your head?
;D ;D ;D

20-12-2003, 10:05 AM
And Im NOT gunna do it again just to get some! >:( >:( ;D


21-12-2003, 04:02 AM
LAst year my wife and I were camping well away from several other campers (approx 2 km) on the banks of the Fitzroy river just south of Derby. I had the wonderful experience of being spiked in the ankle by a CATFISH which required emergency surgery. Which left me pretty much immobile.
As you can imagine getting around on crutches in the bush and trying to maintain a camp etc was very dificult, especially as my foot was in agony for 10 days when ever it was lower than my head.

Here is the funny bit:

Trying to use the "bush toilet " armed with crutches, shovel and toilet roll. Hobbled at high speed for approx 10 minutes away from camp and found a fantastic fallen tree on a slight rise, which came complete with toilet roll holder, crutch rest, shovel hook and a handle(protruding branch) to hold onto. So far so good, I dug the hole in the right spot for me to use the handle, dropped the drawers stuck the injured foot straight out in front of me as I can"t put any weight on it , and proceeded to squat, not unlike a Cossack in slow motion, all while hanging onto the handle. Guess what? The bloody handle broke.
Here's me rolling down the bloody hill squeezing my cheeks together to avoid ending up in a real big mess, bandaged foot banging like blazes on the ground with every revolution and coming to rest against another fallen tree where I seem to have disturbed Mr wasp who decided to take revenge on my shoulder.

I jumped up so quick onto my good leg and tried to hop up hill (because thats where the damn crutches are approx 10 mts away) while waving arms around like a toddler impersonating a helicopter I didn't notice the elderly couple approaching, apparently on their morning walk. And here is me with my shorts still around my ankle.

I still have nightmares about that day.

21-12-2003, 07:13 AM
Brett that is crazy funny, got tears in my eyes, you poor ba***rd!!!nq

21-12-2003, 05:02 PM
Rolling on the floor laughing my @#$%^&%$ ass off Brett !!!
I have tears in my eyes and now the wife is laughing just as hard as I read it to her.

You can keep the nightmares mate, but the world will always smile when they remember this story.

Many thanks for sharing...


22-12-2003, 06:59 AM
Overheard this on the boat ramp at Manly a while back and think it deserves to be posted.
A guy was telling a small crowd the following story interrupted by fits of laughter.
This guy and his family took his father over to Moreton Island for a family barbecue on the beach and just a chance to get him out of the house.
Seems the old guy is retired and has grown rather cranky just sitting around the house.
He is notorious for 2 reasons, firstly his cantankerous moods and secondly for not wearing underpants...

After grumbling all the way over to the island, he didnt want to get out of the boat.
Finally persuaded he lifted both legs over the side until he was sitting on the gunwhale.
Son gently pushing from the rear and grandson pulling whilst standing knee deep in the water.
The old guy moved about 3 inches and let out a scream, calling everyone choice names, some they had to look up later.
The pushed and pulled again and the old guy swore and cursed again and again.
Thinking he was just being stubborn they pushed and pulled again although this time the old guy started to grow tears and was almost begging them to stop. :-[
He was trying to lift his leg and bum cheek off the gunwhale but was in obvious pain each time.
On closer inspection the son found that one of his fathers testicles had fallen out of his shorts and was firmly trapped in one of the flush mount rod holders.
After helping the old guy back into the boat the family all returned to Manly and never got their barbecue on Moreton.
I doubt very much if the son will be able to talk his father into another boat trip...

22-12-2003, 04:51 PM
know a bloke that squatted in the bush one day and got bit on the end of the knob with a bull ant, he spent a couple a days in hospital and he reckon the size increase wasnt worth the pain

23-12-2003, 03:12 PM
Note: Later when I refer to a set of dividers, I am talking about those things you use to measure distances from the scale on a map.

My old man has been fishing for tailor for years and years on a surf club racing ski towing around a feather (in the old days) or a pink rubber squid nowadays. 20ft or so of line is kept on about a 6 inch piece of wood and chucked down the front of your speedos. The golden rule being to make sure the hook is jambed into the wood VERY firmly whilst paddling out through the break or returning. After you are out behind the break you let out the line and trap the piece of wood with the line knotted to it under the tightly knotted cord of your speedos and proceed to troll the feather as you paddle. Basically you just paddle out to the back of the white water around bommies and headlands and handline the fish in after a hook up. Fish then gets threaded onto a bit of insulated wire tied between the footstraps. Wire goes up through a gill and out the mouth so the bastards can't bite you.
Anyway, the tricky bit is the lift out of the water and getting the fish under control because its slippery and spikey and going ape trying to throw the hook, throwing up bait and trying to bite anything it can. Always plenty of scope for getting wounded during this operation with teeth, spikes and hook regularly finding a target.
The best was one day when a 2 - 2.5lb tailor threw the hook just as my old man lifted him out of the water. Fish lands on the ski between the old man's legs and promptly sinks its teeth into the nearest part of my old man which just happened to be the underside of the bag that holds the family jewels. Missed the jewels themselves luckily.
Anyway, tailor don't often let go once they sink their teeth in, so I assume the method of extraction was just a big old fashioned heave ho.
For the next 3 or 4 days he was walking like a set of dividers and a tube of savlon was his best friend in the world. I think it was about 3 to 4 weeks before I saw him heading out fishing again in a new set of speedos.

24-12-2003, 09:42 AM
I think I would be investing in a pair of leather speedos meself.
Or better still a boat. Suppose it could have been worse though.

And by the way I dont want to see photos of that incident ;D

Merry xmas Tony

25-12-2003, 06:41 AM
I think the old man actually gave some thought to investing in a cricket box for a while there, but like all other solutions to guard against this, it would be too uncomfortable after paddling round for a few hours.
Luckily for the world, there are no photos. All I ever saw of it was the old speedos chucked out the next day near the bin with a 1 1/2 inch hole in them. Think a couple of people might have seen a bit more than they wished when he put the ski on his head and walked back up to where the car was parked. :o
There was another fellow who used to do the same thing but with the line tied to his big toe. All was fine whilst catching chopper tailor, but one day he hooked an enourmous trevor which cut his hands up pretty bad trying to keep the weight off his toe, then he almost lost his toe before either the fish got off or he managed to get the loop off. He had been told before, but of course it was a case of "I know boats". ::)
Think he gave it up after that one.

Merry Xmas to you and yours.

25-12-2003, 08:10 AM
Yeah Jeff
A merry christmas to you and your family. When are we going to see some Mannilian piscatorial specimans ??? I take it you must flit back and forth between there and here? When your here rather than there where are you based? If you are ever up this way give me a yell and well go for a bit of a run. They apparently managed to get the Karma off the beach this morning. They ended up virtually plastering the whole inside of the hull to do it.

All the best Tony.